The Business of Being Born Message Board

Planning my HBAC during this, my 4th, pregnancy has been one of the easiest decisions I’ve ever made after the birth experience I had with my 3rd child. I’ll start with where I am now and then backtrack. I am currently in training with DONA to become a birth doula and have also begun, with a friend, a community-based doula program and maternal resource center in Beaumont, TX called Whole Mothering Center (www.WholeMotheringCenter.com). Our hearts are in the same place as Ricki and Abby’s in that we are infuriated with the current state of birth, but specifically with our birth culture locally. What prompted our action, though, is having had bad experiences and realizing that WE could work towards change and positively affect the lives and experiences of women.
All of our local hospitals have now banned VBAC and there are no doctors who are even willing to open the dialogue. We have no local midwifery clinics or birth centers and the only choices for women who want an out of hospital experience are driving to Houston (a 2-hour drive) or praying a Houston-area midwife might make it to a homebirth in time with that same drive. That’s the route I’ve decided on but unfortunately, not many women in our area have the support they need for that to be a viable option. In fact, it wasn’t always an option for me. My husband was adamantly opposed to the idea of homebirth just a couple of years ago. Participating in our last birth and realizing afterwards the manipulation and unethical behaviors of our medical staff (who convinced us that death was certain unless we agreed to the c-section) coupled with getting an education (which included a viewing of BOBB), he now realizes that birth outside of the hospital is likely MUCH safer and certainly preferable. The main point I made to him was this: If I were to birth in the hospital again (provided that VBAC were locally available), I feel quite sure that my generic answer to any suggestion of intervention would be “I don’t consent to that”. IF, by some horrible stroke of bad luck, there were a problem that required intervention, I feel like I might put myself into a dangerous situation by refusing the (rare) necessary intervention which would be live-saving. To be in a place where I don’t trust my caregivers to make good judgement calls on behalf of me and my child isn’t a safe environment for birth. For me, birthing at home with my midwife is undeniably the safest option. I know that if my midwife suggests an intervention, including transfer to a hospital, those suggestions haven’t been swayed by any reasons other than the safety and well-being of myself and/or my baby. How could I go back to an OB or a hospital environment knowing that I don’t trust the people who would surround me? My answer is that my life and the life of my child are more important to me than that. Some people have a misconception that for every women and every child, there is a certain “safety net” that is inherently included in a hospital birth, but I’ve found the opposite to be true. If I can’t trust my caregiver, then why would I EVER consent to any suggestion of intervention? I am in no position to make medical decisions in such a charged and emotional state and so I MUST have ultimate faith that my caregiver is trustworthy and is advising me virtuously. THAT is why I will birth in my home with my midwife surrounded by people who love me and why unless absolutely unavoidable, we won’t set foot into a hospital to birth ever again.