The Business of Being Born Message Board

Q: Hello, I have such anger towards hospitals and the way they treat child birth. In just 2 years, 5 of my friends/family have given birth…not a one was a vaginal birth. Each time I get the message “I had to have a C-Section,” I cringe. Followed by some anger, sadness, and last hopelessness.

How do you suggest I deal with these feelings? I want to share my views and this movie with my girlfriends and family, but I fear I might insult them. Having never been through it, I feel like this may backfire on me. I do not want to make them feel guilty about their births…but it is as if they believe everything they experienced in those hospitals was necessary. I just don’t want to see one more loved one go through this.

Thanks for your time.

Best,

Brooke

A: Brooke, even though you haven’t given birth yet, I think you can FEEL what is wrong with the American Maternity system. It disempowers women, leaving the majority of American women feeling as if they couldn’t do it with out hospital interventions. You have also been sensing that this can be a very touchy issue. Not all women are ready to be this powerful or to look at the ways that our system has treated them. It is a sad predicament. But here is what you can do:

1) Become a childbirth activist. Show The Business of Being Born at your local library for free and have a midwife available afterward to answer questions.
2) Train to be a doula. You can make a real difference for your friends by attending their births and being an advocate.
3) Support your local midwife. See if there is a home birth midwife in your area that needs help. Usually midwives are very busy and would love some volunteer help.
4) Set up a natural childbirth support group in your area. Pregnant moms as well as postpartum moms could attend to tell their stories.
5) Go to my website, www.itsmybodymybabymybirth.com and order my film to go along with the BOBB. It is a shorter film about natural childbirth.
6) Think about coming to our conference on October 17-19, 2008 in Michigan. It is the Midwives Alliance of North America. Go to www.mana.org for details. You’ll be blown away!

You are really on to something. Birth is really an amazing event in a woman’s life and women deserve to be treated with respect and kindness throughout the process. Read as much as you can, learn as much as you can, for your own birthing experience as well as others.

We CAN make a difference,

Maria Iorillo, Licensed Midwife, CPM
www.wisewomanchildbirth.com
wisewomanchildbirth.blogspot.com